If you’ve entered the 3rd decade of your life and are suffering from a difficult breakup, you’ve certainly thought about how much easier you’ve handled your previous breakups. Why is that? Is there a certain pattern or a rule that states that the end of a relationship in your 30s must equal total despair? Or is it just a coincidence? Today, we’ll give you a few examples on how and why breakups are much more difficult once you hit a certain age.
The Social Construct
One of the most expressed problems of getting through a breakup in your 30s is the complete social construct of relationships in general. When you’re in your teens, you still live in a somewhat fairy-tale land and expect prince(ss) charming to sweep you off your feet. When you pass a certain age, you no longer expect movie-like moments and grand romantic gestures we read about only in magazines and watch in TV-shows; rather, you gain a more realistic picture of how relationships actually function in reality. The whole reality-check moment makes the breakup itself more difficult, as you’re aware that getting back on your feet is going to be very hard and not something that an article like “Getting through a break in your 30s in 5 easy steps” is going to help.
The Biological Clock
No matter if you believe in the whole concept of the biological clock or not, there’s someone in your surrounding who does and who’ll, without a doubt, initiate a conversation on the subject. This is especially difficult if you’re a woman going through a breakup, as you constantly have that pressure of a ticking clock inside you head, which gives you the impression that time is slowly (but certainly) running out. When you were younger and going through a breakup, you knew that you still had plenty of time ahead of you to find the one and start a family, which gets more difficult every year. In many cases, this results in an even more serious problem – ending up with someone unfit for you, solely out of the fear of spending the rest of your life alone.
The Mature Behavior
Ahh yes…the whole “you need to act maturely because that’s what adults do after a break up”. This is probably one of the biggest problems, as some people genuinely think that hurting becomes more bearable with age. Not only is this not true, but it might be completely the opposite. There’s an established opinion that mature adults need to act in a certain manner and that showing your emotions after a breakup isn’t considered socially acceptable. It was much easier back when you could simply get over a breakup by crying your eyes out, dancing away your feelings in a nightclub or breaking every vase in the house. Once you hit 30, you’re expected to hold back your tears, act with style and ignore that lump in your throat every time someone asks about your former partner.
The Getting Back in the Game Process
Last, but certainly not the least is the sole process of getting back in the game and finding someone new. If you still don’t know the proper ways on how to get your ex back, then it’s quite possible that you’re now trying to find a new relationship, which is not as easy as it seems. It’s likely that your wooing game is a bit rusty and that you’re not acquainted with where you can actually find people your age. If all your friends are in a relationship or married, it only makes the process of finding your soul mate more difficult.
We’ve all been there – broken hearted, in despair, without a chance of getting back on our feet. Yes, breakups are hard, there’s no doubt about it. But, there’s something different about going through a breakup in your teens and trying to grasp the meaning behind it once you’re over 30. But you know what they say – it’s never too late to start over, never too late to be happy.
Roxana is a Sydney based travel enthusiast with a passion for writing. She loves fashion and has an eye for anything visually appealing and aesthetically. She is all about the healthy lifestyle, loves to run with her husband and dogs and has fun cooking exotic meals for her family. You can find her articles on HighStyleLife and StyleByAsia.
Victoria says
Totally relate with this post. When you’re over thirty the biological clock is definitely ticking…it makes the breakup feel that much worse knowing you have to start all over again and time is running out.